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Many women will recognize it: there is a nice guy who you often meet in the most common places: at work, on public transport, in your favorite bar — you name it. Every time you see him, he behaves in the same way: flirty and full of interest. Although, interest… If he was really interested, he would have asked for your number. And that is where it ends, because he just doesn’t do it.
So you are now asking yourself the following question: “Why doesn’t he ask for my number? It bothers you and it is quite confusing for you. He just won’t take the step, and yet there is a (mutual) interest. What is going on in his head that keeps him from asking you out? Well, today we will take you through a number of common scenarios why he flirts but does nothing.
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Men…are men
Just as unpredictable as women are to men, sometimes the opposite is also true. That is why it is quite difficult to be able to read the minds of men, because let’s face it: women often have romantic thoughts quite quickly, while for many men it quickly becomes a game. Women also know much faster what they want, while men have not even thought about it yet. A man sees you, looks at you, but does so without specific plans, while a woman has already very specifically mapped out what the first date will look like. If it even happens.
What we do need to emphasize is that attraction alone does not always ensure that something comes out of it. Because there can also be completely different reasons that prevent the man you have in mind from taking the step. Think for example of:
1. He already has a woman in his life
Yes, he is married , but he doesn’t wear a ring. Or he is at least taken and living with someone, or simply has a girlfriend. Unfortunately, she doesn’t stop him from flirting with you and others, but the woman in his life does limit his dating. And yes, that also means that he would flirt with others if you were his girlfriend.
2. He doesn’t need a date
No matter how much he flirts or how great he thinks you are, he doesn’t want to date. He’s not into relationships, he’s too busy with work or has other things on his mind. Whatever the reason, right now, at this stage in his life, he doesn’t want to date.
3. He just needs an ego boost
When you flirt with this guy, it feels really good to him. He soaks up your flirty energy and his ego gets the boost he craves. He is someone who is vain and whose ego needs to be blasted, he loves compliments. The guy you have in mind loves female attention and he doesn’t care who it is with. So that doesn’t necessarily mean he likes you , he probably does this with every woman he sees. Sorry!
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4. He likes to flirt
Let’s not forget that flirting is also a game. Flirting is sexy, entertaining and even a bit creative. And besides, we all like a flirt now and then. He even sees it as a pastime and when he has nothing to do, he flirts as much as he can. Incidentally, this can also be related to point 3, with flirting he also strokes his ego.
5. He wants to stand out among friends
This is another version of the previously mentioned ego boost. When he flirts, it’s not just for himself, it’s for an audience. He doesn’t just want your attention, he wants other men to see how much you want him. So this is really all about him and not about you. He’s just a slick slicker trying to impress his friends.
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6. He likes to fantasize
Now, a reason that we can call a bit nasty. Flirting with you gives him a whole lot of new fantasy fodder. What do we mean by that? He can use the encounters with you to give his sex life a boost . Sounds a bit creepy , right? Well, it happens often enough. Some people have a very vivid fantasy life.
7. He knows you’re not right for each other
Sometimes a man knows that you are out of his reach. Maybe you have a completely different socio-economic background, maybe there are even cultural differences. But he still finds you incredibly attractive . However, he doesn’t move on because he knows that you are ultimately not a good fit. It is clear to him in advance that it would never work. However, that does not mean that he does not enjoy flirting with you.
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What can you do?
The best thing would of course be if you could get one of the above reasons confirmed. For example, imagine that you suddenly bump into him with his girlfriend or wife at his side, then at least you know where you stand. Or that you have a friend or girlfriend in common, who tells you that your flirt just likes to flirt. In all these scenarios you at least have a result. What should you do with it?
- Enjoy the flirting: and just let it feed your ego. You can use the moments to develop your own conversation and flirting skills. If you look at it that way, you can’t really ignore the fact that the exchanges are also very useful to practice your own flirting techniques and maybe even do the same as he does: make yourself feel like a desirable woman. This prepares you to flirt with other men who are available and who do want to go on a date with you.
- Give it up: On the other hand, if these flirtatious remarks leave you with a bitter taste, avoid him as much as possible from now on. Let him know that you are no longer playing his game. Be reserved and get him out of your head.
- Keep your self-respect: don’t lower yourself. Don’t keep falling back on him and keep your self-respect if you have indeed seen him with someone else. There are many more men who are just as flirtatious, but who do have serious intentions.
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