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Have you ever experienced that awkward mix of feelings when you are in love with someone and they are in love with you, but at the same time you also have a longing for someone else? Or perhaps you are attracted to a person other than your partner, and are seriously considering trying something with that? These are just a few of the many complex situations that can lead to the infamous love triangle: a relationship that unfolds between three people and often presents numerous challenges.
Sometimes such a relationship arises when two people compete for the attention of the same person, while in other cases all three are linked in a complex web of emotions. We will tell you more about what exactly a love triangle is, what makes this form of relationship difficult and what the challenges are.
What is a love triangle?
When we talk about a love triangle, we are not talking about the relationship between three angles. A love triangle is a relationship between three people, where at least one of them has feelings for two others at the same time. This situation can occur when you and someone else are in love with the same person and are competing for attention, but it also occurs when three people are in a relationship. As you understand, these types of relationships can be very complex and therefore they are often accompanied by intense emotions, obstacles and challenges.
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What makes it different?
A love triangle is different from a normal relationship because it involves three people instead of two. When love is shared by two people it is simple and direct. When more people join it becomes tricky . This situation can lead to complex dynamics and challenges that do not occur in a normal two-person relationship.
For example, in a love triangle, you and someone else may compete for the attention and affection of a third party. There may be jealousy, insecurity and inequality. Additionally, it can be difficult to maintain communication and balance between everyone involved, especially if – as is often the case with this relationship – you and the other two are not on the same page.
On the other hand, a love triangle can also be very enriching if everyone communicates openly and honestly and is willing to work on the relationship. This is, for example, the case if there is a polygamous relationship, in which one person has a relationship with two or more people.
This is not a love triangle
If you are only in love with someone else or are attracted to someone else, while you are already in a relationship, this does not immediately mean that you have a love triangle. A love triangle only exists if there is not one relationship between two people, but several relationships between three people.
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The difference with cheating
It is not difficult to confuse a love triangle with cheating , because the two are often on the same page and in both cases it is a relationship involving three people. However, there are some important differences between the two.
Cheating involves deception and a lack of openness. Cheating happens in secret and there is no honesty towards the partner. Cheating involves one person having a romantic and/or sexual relationship with another person outside the existing relationship. In a love triangle there is usually openness and honesty between everyone involved – everyone is aware of it.
A love triangle is therefore not necessarily the same as cheating, although it can lead to complicated situations if, for example, you are not aware of the involvement of a third person who has started a relationship with your partner. In a healthy love triangle, such as in a polygamous relationship , there is mutual consent, openness, and respect between everyone who is part of the relationship.
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The three parties
A love triangle often has clear roles of guilty, target and victim. The person who inserts himself into an existing relationship out of interest in one of the partners is usually regarded as the guilty one, while the person confronted with this interference is seen as the victim. The target is the one with whom both parties want a relationship.
It is these three parties that together form a complex web of emotions and interests: those involved in the existing relationship, and the third person who tries to break in. These are the three parties:
- The culprit: interferes in the existing relationship.
- The target: represents a choice.
- The victim: faces competition.
Challenges of a love triangle
If you find yourself in a love triangle, there are several challenges you may face. You may face uncertainty about which of the two people you love more and who you want to continue with. It can lead to an imbalance of power and control, leaving you feeling trapped between two worlds. These are the challenges and obstacles of a love triangle.
1. Uncertainty
One of the biggest challenges of a love triangle is the uncertainty. There is a constant fear of abandonment and you never really know where you stand. If you are the target, the one in the center of the triangle, you are constantly wondering which of the two you love more and who you should choose.
2. Jealousy
Another challenge you will face is jealousy . If you pay more attention to one person, the other will become jealous and vice versa, of course. Jealousy is never easy in a relationship, but in a love triangle it’s even harder to deal with.
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3. Competition
When two people compete for one and the same person, a natural competition arises. There is a battle going on between the two people competing for the love of the same person. This battle undoubtedly leads to tensions, arguments and uncomfortable situations between everyone involved.
4. Distrust
In a love triangle there is often deception and secrecy . This can lead to mistrust and a loss of respect between those involved. If you leave things out and don’t tell your partner some things, they will feel betrayed and hurt when it becomes known.
5. Imbalance of power and control
A love triangle can also lead to an imbalance of power and control. If you are the target, you may feel like you have no control over your own life and choices.
6. Social stigmas
A love triangle is often condemned from the outside. This can make you feel isolated and misunderstood by your friends, family, and other people you know.
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How do you end up in a love triangle?
It may seem like you could never find yourself in such a situation, but sometimes it can happen unconsciously and you have no control over it. For example, you are single and fall in love with someone who is already in a relationship. That’s something that can happen to anyone and it’s an ingredient for a potential love triangle. If this happens to you, you can try to ignore these feelings and keep them to yourself. But if you actively act on them, it can lead to a complicated love triangle.
Even though you think this won’t happen to you, it is not that difficult to end up in this situation. It usually starts with an innocent and attractive diversion that gradually develops into a full-fledged affair with someone already in a relationship. Lust and tension take over and the consequences are momentarily forgotten. Before you know it, you are involved with someone who is already in a relationship and the love triangle is a fact.
Although no one can control who they fall in love with, a love triangle is always a choice. You don’t have to give in to a third party, even if that option seems very attractive. The best option is still to avoid love triangles to avoid anyone getting hurt.
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