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Relationships are not easy. There is no mathematical formula that makes it clear whether you have found the right person to share your life with. Love is complex. And for everyone, the expectations and wishes in an ideal partner and a relationship are different. It is therefore not easy to find the right person. Potential partners do not walk around with a barcode to scan to find out whether this is the one for you.
If you want to start dating, it is therefore important to know exactly what you are looking for in a relationship. In order to find the ideal partner for you, you must of course know exactly what you want. But how do you know what you want in a relationship?
Below we give you some tips and advice to help you with this. This way you can go looking for love prepared and you might find the perfect partner in no time. Who knows .
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It is a conscious choice
When it comes to dating, many people often choose a date based on appearance. They look at the superficial things like hair color, whether he or she has beautiful eyes and wears nice clothes. Of course, appearance is also important, but to find the right partner, you will also have to look at more important character traits.
One of the most important things in a relationship is that your personalities fit together. You need to be able to communicate on the same level and talk about important topics. Different interests? No problem. If you can communicate well with each other, then that doesn’t have to be a dealbreaker at all.
It is important to know that you cannot change a person. You will therefore have to be honest and clear with each other and accept any differences.
“You can’t change the direction of the wind, but you can adjust the sails to reach your destination.” – Jimmy Dean
Look back at previous relationships
The past and your previous relationships are an important learning experience for finding what you really want in a relationship. It is therefore important to think carefully about your previous relationships and partners. What went wrong in this relationship? Was there something you didn’t like about your partner at all?
It is very important to know if there are things that bothered you and if there were things that really did not work for your relationship. Addictions, certain habits, jealousy : you name it. By finding out these things, you will have more tools for finding a partner and a good relationship in the future.
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Visualize the future and your goals
Looking at the past is not the only thing that is very important to figure out what you want in a relationship. The future is perhaps even more important. If you are looking for a long-term partner, this will be a shared future. The goals and dreams that you have must match each other for that.
Therefore, make a list of your goals for the future and what you still want to do. Do you still want to study? Make a big world trip? Emigrate abroad? Or do you perhaps want to settle down soon and start having children?
If you know what you envision for your future, it will also be a lot easier to find a suitable partner. By communicating openly about your dreams and goals, you can find out if you have the same values and ideas for the future. This will make it less likely to be a stumbling block.
It is of course wise to know that a person probably never has 100% the same dreams and goals for the future. The most important thing here is that you express these differences and talk about them. Are they things that can still change? Or are the differences too big to make a suitable joint future possible?
Close your eyes..
A handy tip to help you visualize your dreams for the future: close your eyes and imagine your own future. Where do you see yourself in 5 or 10 years, for example? Will you still be in the same place, or will you have moved to the countryside or to the city? It is good to have your future in mind so that you can find someone who fits into that picture and can share your life with you.
What do you really want?
Another important point is to find out what you really want. There are often a lot of family members and friends who all have dreams for you. Maybe they really want a rough and tough man (or woman) for you, while you would rather look for a quieter type. It is important to distinguish your own wishes from the wishes and dreams of others. Make clear what you really want and also express this to others, so that they can also focus more on your dreams.
Knowing what you want is essential to a fulfilling relationship. When you know more about who you are and what you want, you will make better choices and have your priorities in order.
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Do you know what you want? Start dating
Another way to figure out what you want in a relationship is to date. If you don’t have much experience with relationships, it can be hard to know what you want. By starting to date, you can figure out what kind of person is right for you and what kind of person isn’t. Don’t know where to start?
Do you already have a lot of dating experience, but have you not yet met the right person? Then try dating people who fit the above-mentioned aspects, such as your vision of the future. Try not to only talk about superficial matters, but take the plunge. Sometimes it takes a risk to find true love .
Are you unsure during dating or a relationship whether you really fit together and whether it is a good relationship? The most important thing is the feeling you have with that person, but in addition, the communication must be good and you both must be at ease.
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