Share This Article
You get home from a date with your crush. As you recheck everything you said, you wonder how it was done. Did you say something wrong? Did you commit an obvious turn-off? Or was it all not that bad?
You’re excited at the prospect of meeting the other person again, but you’re still nervous because you don’t know if the feeling is mutual. Even though you weren’t told it would be just one date, you’re still a little worried. Was it a successful date for the other person? Was the date good? Or… was it particularly bad?
ALSO READ: 35 Playful Dates to Keep Your Relationship Alive
Was the date good or bad?
After you’ve been on a date, you may wonder if it was good or bad. Sometimes it’s obvious that it was good, but other times it can be a challenge to decipher whether the date was a success. There are also so many things that go into a first date that it’s never entirely certain where you stand.
From physical attraction to body language to the nerves that cloud your vision, it’s never easy to judge a first date. Even when it led to a deep kiss, it could still have been the result of intense lust …not love. And that makes it hard to evaluate a first date.
The most important indicator
A few years ago, a dating app conducted research into the conversations that take place on the platform and during the dates that follow. The research by Plenty of Fish (POF), which was conducted among 2,000 singles, showed that a ‘good conversation’ is the most important indicator of a successful date for them. Nine out of ten respondents identified the conversation as the gold standard for a great date.
Being able to have a good conversation is so important to dating that it has the power to increase your attractiveness. In fact, the same study also found that 87 percent of respondents found someone more attractive after a good conversation. And unfortunately, the reverse is also true: a difficult conversation can actually decrease attraction. After realizing they have nothing in common with you, 61 percent of singles say they feel less attracted.
ALSO READ: One-Sided Relationship? 22 Signs It’s Coming from One Side
13 Signs That Indicate a Successful Date
A good conversation is just one of many signs that can indicate a successful date. How your date looks at you, what exactly you discuss, and how comfortable you are are all factors that influence the perception of a first date. Here are 13 signs that indicate a successful first date.
1. You think it went well
How did you feel about the date? Before you try to imagine how the other person felt, your own feelings can tell you a lot about how it went. If you feel like it was a positive experience, that’s generally a good sign. Because it’s more likely that the other person feels the same way. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re attracted to each other, but it does mean that you enjoyed each other’s company – and that’s a great start.
2. You felt a click
A click isn’t everything. But it can be a good indicator. Did the other person laugh at your jokes? Were there more than one “Me too!” moment? Did the other person look you in the eye when you spoke? Did the other person lean in a bit? These are the typical signs that say there was some kind of click . Although that doesn’t necessarily mean that an appointment should be made with a wedding planner, it does say something about the date itself.
ALSO READ: Is He The One? Not If He Does These 25 Things
3. Your date wanted to do well
Think back to the little moments during the date. Did you feel like the other person wanted to present themselves in the best possible way? In other words, how well did your date try? Maybe your drink spilled and the other person quickly cleaned it up. Little signs like that say a lot about how your date was feeling, because they are the signs that the other person wanted to make the best possible impression. And you don’t do that so clearly if you are not interested in the other person.
4. Your date was a mirror
Did the date feel familiar and you’re not sure why? It could be that your date mirrored your actions and movements—or vice versa. A well-known 2008 study published in the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin found that people tend to mimic their date’s movements and body language when they’re attracted to them. Talking in the same tone of voice, using the same body language, and moving your hands just as vigorously are signs that things were going well on a date.
5. It took longer than expected
One of the strongest signs of a successful date is the mutual decision to extend the date. Did you meet for an afternoon walk in the city and did it extend with a dinner ? Or did you go out for dinner and did it not just become a main course, but a four-course meal with 2 cappuccinos after dessert? When the date lasts longer than you originally planned, there is little to think about: it was a success.
6. You laughed at the same things
Laughing together and at the same time is one of the better signs of connection. Especially on a date, research shows. For example, a study published in Evolutionary Psychology found that laughing together was a sign of (dating) interest from both people. In other words, if two people laugh at the same time on a date, they are more likely to have a romantic interest in each other.
7. You all made eye contact with each other
There’s a difference between seeing, looking, and making eye contact. The latter is one of the most subtle signs that a first date is going well. It’s an unmistakable form of showing interest in another person. In a study on attraction published in the journal Psychological Science, researchers asked participants to look at photos of strangers. They were then asked to indicate whether they felt romantically or sexually attracted to that person. And guess what?
When they had a romantic interest, their eyes were directed to the person’s face to make eye contact. If it was just sexual, their eyes went mainly to the person’s body.
ALSO READ: Couples Have More in Common Than We Think’
8. There were touches
Did your date keep touching you during your time together? Not suggestively, but just putting their hand on yours, checking your watch, or leaning against you? It’s a sign that they’re attracted to you. People have a hard time keeping their hands off people they’re attracted to. If your date is attracted to you, they’ll take every opportunity to touch you. But be warned: not everyone does this. So it could be a sign – if it happens.
9. You became intimate
Before you immediately think of a one-on-one between the sheets, getting intimate doesn’t necessarily mean having sex. A deep hug that lasts a minute or a soft kiss at the end of the date also fall under the heading of ‘getting intimate’. And even if you walked to the car hand-in-hand, it’s an intimate experience. These are all great signs that the date was a success.
10. Your date was involved
Smiling and nodding a little during a conversation doesn’t mean much. It’s a skill we all learned when we were sitting in school dreaming of places we’d rather be. Nodding and uh-huhing aren’t good indicators of whether someone is engaged in the conversation. But it is when your date asks questions about things you said earlier in the conversation. Because that’s the sign that the other person is not only hearing you, but actually listening to you.
11. You have things in common
Some people say that ‘ opposites attract ‘ while others believe that it’s ‘like attracts like’. Who are you to believe? No one, because while you don’t want to live completely different lives, you don’t want to be exactly the same either. The reality is that you need to have at least some things in common to make a relationship work.
Do you exercise daily, the other never? Do you eat healthy, the other doesn’t? Are you active, does the other prefer to lie in bed? These are the examples that are very telling during a date. Despite the fact that you find the other super attractive, too many of these differences are disastrous for a relationship . And the singles who realize this, will therefore not label the date as successful… but rather as disastrous.
12. You discussed the (near) future
No, we’re not talking about a crystal ball or the end of the world. We’re talking about a potential second date or future dates. When we’re positive about a date, we can’t help but drop hints about a subsequent date . Is the other person paying for the first date because a potential second date will be at your expense? Just mark this date as a success, because you can’t get a better signal than that.
ALSO READ: 114 Best Date Ideas for First, Second and More Dates
13. You received a message quickly after a date
Unless it was a rejection, a message indicates that it was a success. This is pretty self-explanatory. But if you receive a positive message after you already felt that the date was a success, then there is nothing to worry about. Your date clearly wants to see you again. The only question is: do you want that too?
P.S. Are you already following Gistinger.com on Facebook , Instagram and Twitter?