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When you start dating, an intoxicating crush takes over. You think about your new lover all the time, you make time for each other, and you may even temporarily make this new person in your life more of a priority than your friends.
Studies confirm that the early stages of a relationship can be intoxicating. You turn into a different person – into someone who does things you would otherwise never do. But before you know it, this period will be over and everything will become more normal. The intoxication turns into awareness and routine. You put less and less effort into the relationship. And that can pose a danger to the future of the relationship.
Make an effort for your relationship
How much time, energy and attention do you put into your relationship? When we talk about making an effort for your relationship, this is what it means: investing time, energy and attention to strengthen the relationship. This can be done by spending time together, supporting each other, being open to compromises and treating each other respectfully. If you make an effort to put a positive spin on your relationship, there is a good chance that the relationship will be lasting and happy .
Making an effort for your relationship is important to strengthen the bond between you and your partner. By making an effort you can show that you care about each other and value the relationship. The problem arises when you no longer put any effort into the relationship, because then it can feel like you are letting the relationship slide. Your partner may feel rejected or taken for granted if you no longer make an effort for the relationship and this can lead to alienation. Ultimately, if it doesn’t change, it could lead to the relationship falling apart.
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6 ways to put in more effort
Putting more effort into your relationship is about attention, intimacy and involvement in each other’s lives. This makes your partner feel seen and appreciated. If you want to invest more in your relationship, you can put more effort into these ways.
1. Love and appreciation
One of the best ways to put effort into a relationship is to show love and appreciation. This can be done through small gestures such as hugging , touching each other or giving compliments . Also let us know that you are happy with what your partner does: when he or she does the shopping, cooks for you or takes care of the children. With small, simple gestures you clearly show that your partner is important to you.
2. Quality time
More quality time with your partner is a way to put more effort into your relationship. Quality time, as it is also translated, does not necessarily have to be special or spectacular. It’s about being together and paying full attention to each other. Create the opportunity to listen to each other and hear each other’s stories. Also try to keep distractions away, such as the television, phone, or computer, so that you can both be fully present to each other.
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3. Surprise
Surprise your partner with something fun or unexpected, such as going out for dinner or doing something your partner has wanted to do for a long time. You can also come up with something exciting, such as a weekend away or an evening in a hotel. Or simple things like going to the movies together or going bowling. This way, your partner feels appreciated and seen, because you show that you make an effort for your partner’s company.
4. Communicate in an open manner
Good communication is crucial in all relationships. Talk openly with each other about everything that is going on in your life, share what you are experiencing and start a conversation to ask your partner’s opinion. Listen with attention and interest to what the other person says, make room to exchange ideas or enter into discussions. All this helps to look at each other’s positions and ideas with understanding.
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5. Listen to each other
Listening to each other is just as important as talking – perhaps even more important. Don’t pretend to listen to your partner while you are internally absent. Focus on what your partner is saying and also try to make non-verbal contact by, for example, maintaining eye contact . Listen actively, ask a question along the way and encourage your partner to continue talking.
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6. Show commitment
Finally, it is important to be involved in the relationship. This means that you are involved in each other’s lives and that you take responsibility for the relationship. If you see opportunities to improve the relationship , speak up. This requires a proactive attitude in starting conversations and solving problems. But this can also be done by offering a helping hand when one of you could use some support.
In essence, putting effort into your relationship is actually very simple. By making an effort for your partner, you show affection and love and keep your bond strong and healthy. Relationships may require some hard work, but the effort you put in is always worth it.
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