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Whether you have children, want children or are just curious. The tips below will give you more insight into how to raise a happy and healthy child.
1. Give them plenty of time to just play.
A child’s biggest responsibility should be to play. Of course, children will have homework, have after-school activities and play sports, but from toddler to teenager, children need time to play.
Peter Gray, child psychologist and professor at Boston Fellow says: “Children learn the most important lessons of life from other children, not from adults… they cannot learn this, or they are less likely to learn this through interaction with adults.” Therefore, give your children time to play outside with neighbors.
2. Keep your child away from heavy discussions
A child’s brain develops very quickly during his early childhood. Seeing and hearing adult problems and insecurities can negatively affect a child’s delicate psychological state; this can make them insecure and cause them to worry. Children should not hear stressed conversations between adults, it is not yet their time to be exposed to this.
Also Read: Your Phone Use Has a Worse Influence on Your Child Than You Think!
3. Don’t compare them to others
The pressure to succeed in today’s society can create a sense of competition from an early age and some parents give their children this pressure by comparing them to someone else. Sometimes parents also point out nice qualities in another child in the hope that their child will copy this behavior. But researchers say this actually has an adverse effect on a child’s self-confidence and self-esteem.
4. Teach Children the Benefits of Negative Emotions
To emphasize the obvious – a child is not yet an adult. Almost every child will have spontaneous outbursts of anger, jealousy, sadness, etc. This behavior gives you as an adult a good learning opportunity.
John Gottman of the University of Washington criticizes the fact that most parents punish these negative emotions. But according to him, you can better accept that this behavior exists by teaching your child that everyone experiences negative emotions sometimes and by teaching your child how he or she can deal with these emotions.
5. Recognize Their Efforts
A child comes to an age where they understand that hard work is needed to get ahead. It is important to recognize when a child is pushing themselves to achieve something.
Dr. Carol S. Dweck of Stanford University says: “Our message to parents is to focus on the process children are in at that moment, such as trying to focus on a task. So instead of saying, “You’re so smart,” they should say, “You’re so good at solving puzzles.”
Also Read: 7 Ways We’re Holding Our Children Back From Being Successful Later in Life
6. Value family traditions
If you do various things together as a family, this is a good signal of a stable household and stability is an important part of a child’s development.
According to the American Child Development Institute, there are 5 major benefits to having regular family time: The child feels important and loved; The child observes positive behavior in adults; Parents can learn more about their child’s weaknesses so they can better guide him or her; The child can verbally express his or her feelings and thoughts and the parents and children develop a stronger bond.
7. Let Them Take Risks
Children need a certain amount of supervision, but parents can also overdo this by monitoring every step their children take. This has the opposite effect.
Researchers say: “Does constant attention to the child and their imagined needs and issues make parents expect less from their child? As a result, the child almost never faces difficult situations, does not learn to deal with discomfort and thus does not learn perseverance, maturity and other important life skills? According to recent research, the answer is: yes.”
8. Give them a sense of (individual) responsibility
This is actually an extension of point 7; it is important to allow children to have responsibilities (chores, homework, etc.) without you being on top of them. Why? Because, according to psychologists, too much ‘interference’ can lead to children developing the attitude of “I can’t do this alone”. Although attention and discipline are necessary for children to learn the consequences of certain behavior, too much interference is ineffective.
Also Read: Why and How I Teach My Introverted Children To Take Up Space
9. Be happy yourself
Children learn by what they see and hear, in good and bad moments. If an adult shows positive behavior, a child will probably copy it. According to Carolyn Cowan, a psychologist at the University of California, children do less well when their parents do not take good care of themselves or their relationships.
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