Share This Article
Everyone has experienced it, no matter how pretty, nice or sweet you are: rejection. Maybe you looked your best and thought you were irresistible. But there is always someone in the room who thinks differently.
Yes, we know it sucks, but rejection is a vital part of the dating game. And being able to handle and accept rejection well is an even more important part of it.
Don’t forget that you can be rejected for all sorts of reasons and that sometimes it can even be about completely external reasons that have nothing to do with you. Reason enough to face rejections, or being turned down , in a relaxed way.
That may seem a bit unreal when the rejection is still fresh and still bothering you, but you have to learn to deal with it. That way you know at least that it can’t affect you. Or at least a lot less. Because rejection is part of life, no matter how hard it may be.
ALSO READ: 114 Best Date Ideas for First, Second and More Dates
What is rejection?
Rejection is a formal and cold word for getting ‘no’ to a request. This can be anywhere: at school, at work, at the town hall, at a job interview, or during a charm offensive in a bar or disco. In this article we will focus on rejections in the relational sphere, which is why we can also refer to it as ‘getting rejected’.
You approach someone, you try to connect with someone, or you want to impress someone, only to quickly find out that the other person is not interested in you or your advances. This is annoying, especially if you really like the other person . However, you should not dwell on it for too long, unless you are so fascinated by the other person that you want to do everything in your power to impress him or her. In any case, rejection is also part of the road to real success in many cases.
In order to feel the highs well, you also need to know how it feels when things are not going so well. In this case, we mean a rejection in a somewhat dramatic way. The moral of the story is not to get discouraged by this minor setback, because it could just mean that it was meant to be.
ALSO READ: Couples Have More in Common Than We Think’
9 Tips to Better Handle Rejection
That brings us to the next point, because there are a lot of ways to deal with rejection. There are quite a few scenarios imaginable and one situation is not the same as the other. Generally speaking, you would do well to follow the following nine tips.
1. Do not insult the other person
Logical, right? Well, not always. Because you’ve just had a hard rejection and feel insulted to the core. Try not to insult the other person. Most people will be able to behave maturely enough, but don’t let yourself be tempted to burst into anger or insult the other person.
The other person has the right to say ‘no’ and preferably this is done in the most decent way possible. The rejection does not necessarily have to be aimed at you personally, remember that. Maybe the other person has just experienced something unpleasant and the answer would have been completely different on another day and time.
2. Accept the rejection
The only way to process rejection is to accept it. Take a few seconds if you need to, but make sure you are mature and calm in your response. Chances are it took courage to approach the other person (or send them a DM) and that is why it is a huge disappointment, but remember that the other person is allowed to say no.
3. Be honest
Be honest with yourself about how you feel. Acknowledge the feelings that come with the rejection and make sure you deal with it in the right way. We understand that it can be hurtful sometimes, but remember that rejection is not always the other person’s fault and that you should not take it out on them. Maybe they are waiting for someone else, maybe they are attracted to the same sex, well, you never know. Try not to force things.
ALSO READ: Is He The One? Not If He Does These 25 Things
4. Don’t try to change the other person’s mind
Ideally, you would just like to ask the question again and get the answer you want right away. That is worth it if you are willing to fight for the other person, because if you really see your dream partner, you will have to reconsider making a little more effort. In all other cases: let it go and continue with what you were doing.
5. Don’t rule out friendship
As long as you don’t make a big deal out of it and deal with the rejection maturely, this person can still be a part of your life in the form of a friendship. Sometimes it can be the start of a good friendship , so don’t cut ties just because it didn’t work out romantically. Now, this scenario is more applicable if you and your intended partner already know each other a bit better. You may have had a great time together, so don’t break that off all at once.
6. No, the other person owes you nothing
You probably want a clear explanation of why the other person is saying no. Remember, there isn’t necessarily a one-size-fits-all explanation for why you were rejected. But keep in mind that the other person doesn’t necessarily owe you a detailed explanation. Phrase your request for an explanation in a mature and calm manner, and if they don’t want to give you that answer, don’t try to force it.
ALSO READ: One-Sided Relationship? 22 Signs It’s Coming from One Side
7. Don’t overthink it
Rejection is completely normal and happens to everyone. Literally everyone. Try to remember that there could be a million reasons for rejection; whether it’s at the bar or already in an advanced stage. In the latter case, it could be personal insecurities, family related, career-oriented or because the other person doesn’t want to jeopardize the friendship. Just as the other person doesn’t have to give you an explanation, you don’t have to search endlessly for one either.
8. It was meant to be
If it doesn’t work between the two of you, it doesn’t work. It’s that simple. At least on paper. It’s easy to talk from the sidelines, of course, but the truth is that things are the way they are — and I think a lot of people can relate to that. So it’s time to move on and get back to business as usual.
Focus on the other things in your life. If it was really meant to be, it would have happened; that click , that spark between you and your intended partner. We already mentioned that you sometimes have to accept things as they are and that also has to do with this reason. It was just meant to be that he or she didn’t like you.
ALSO READ: 35 Playful Dates to Keep Your Relationship Alive
9. Not all rejections are romantic
Rejection is a part of life. We all get rejected. By potential partners, for jobs, for an audition, or rejected for whatever reason and in whatever setting. It may be a bitter pill to swallow at first, but it’s one we all have to taste in life.
Some rejections are brutal and not as playful as in romantic comedies. Be prepared for that, because not all people have class when they express their disinterest. Not all rejections are equally romantic.
P.S. Are you already following Gistinger.com on Facebook , Instagram and Twitter?