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Everyone wants to find love. From single colleagues and friends to family members and sports club members; people everywhere are looking for their partner. Unfortunately, it can still be quite difficult to find that perfect partner. While sometimes all it takes is one person: you!
There’s almost nothing more fun than pairing two people together, especially if those two people are friends of yours. Do you have two friends who don’t know each other well, but who you think would make a perfect couple? Pair them up.
You want to bring them together, but how do you do that? How do you successfully bring these friends together? What steps do you need to take to bring them together? Where do you start and what do you need to pay attention to?
What is ‘connecting people’?
Matchmaking means that you bring together two people who you think would make a nice couple. Two people who you think would be a good fit for each other or who could have a nice date together. When you match people, you are essentially playing Cupid. It is the old-fashioned way that many people met each other, in the pre-internet era.
Of course, we all know the old-school method with a blind date as an example. Imagine you have two friends who you think are a good match. Without them knowing each other, you plan a dinner for them where they can get to know each other better. Afterwards, you hear that they really like each other and that they are going on a follow-up date . Who do they have to thank for that luck? Exactly…
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10 Ways and Steps to Pair
Just putting two people together, without any prior information, doesn’t work. You are the one who decides which two people will sit opposite each other, what they will do and what they know about each other. How do you connect the two people? These are 10 ways and steps that will help you.
1. Subtly tell things about the other person
If these two friends haven’t met yet, it’s smart to subtly share some information about the other. Drop his or her name by chance. Tell them about your friend who is just as creative or who “happens” to like the same movie. Don’t reveal your further thoughts about the two of them together, just throw around some names. Don’t overdo it and keep it to small details.
2. Ask if they are both single
With most friends you already know the answer, but if you don’t: ask both people inconspicuously if they are single. Talk about the many benefits of a relationship. Convince them to look for a nice partner. By talking about this, both friends will start thinking about dating again. By keeping this conversation going in later contacts, you build a foundation for matching.
ALSO READ: Couples Have More in Common Than We Think’
3. Introduce your friends to each other
The next step is of course to introduce your friends to each other. But don’t do this right away on a romantic date that you have arranged for them. First introduce them to each other during a casual activity. For example, go shopping together, to the cinema or to a concert. Do a fun activity together without them knowing that you are trying to set them up. This way they can both be completely themselves. Without the nerves and awkwardness that you can feel on a first date.
4. Step away for a moment to leave them alone
If you are at an activity together, step away for a moment. This way you leave the two of them alone for a while so that they can have a conversation together. This way they can get to know each other a bit better. Never leave them alone for too long, because it will quickly seem suspicious and become awkward.
5. Tell positive things about the other person
Now that they have met, you can take the next steps. Quietly tell the other person positive things about your friend. For example, tell them that they are such a family person and have a great relationship with their family. Or tell them about the milestones they have achieved. Pay attention to how they respond to these positive stories. These responses will give you a lot of information about whether they like each other.
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6. Discuss common interests
For example, if your friend is particularly fond of a certain artist, let them know that your other friend is also a big fan of that artist. If your friend is very into sports, let them know that they are also a huge athlete. By sharing common interests of both friends, they will automatically become more interested in each other. Again, be careful not to make it too obvious and always try to mention it inconspicuously in a conversation.
7. Ask questions about the other person
Before you send them on a real date and the real hooking up can begin, you should already have an idea of what they think of each other. Is there any interest or attraction to the other or is there already a small crush developing? Don’t ask open-ended questions that are too obvious. For example, ask: “He’s very handsome, don’t you think?” or “She’s quite intelligent, don’t you think?”
8. Decide if you want to send them on a date
The answers to the questions should give you an indication of whether there is a chance for a traditional match. Is there interest or attraction between the two? You have seen how they interact and you have a general idea of how they feel about each other. Do you think their personalities and interests could be a good fit? Make a well-considered decision before setting them up on a date.
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9. Don’t couple too quickly or too slowly
It is important not to rush the pairing process. It can quickly become an awkward situation. It is important to take the time to see if they are compatible and what they think of each other. It is also important not to go too slow. For example, if they are already friends, they may already be in each other’s friend zone .
10. Planning the date
Once you have completed these steps, it is time to decide if you want to send both friends on a date. There are 3 options to plan the final date.
Plan a date yourself
Are you sure you want to send both friends on a date? Follow these steps to pair them up.
- First, tell them about your plans to get married.
- Then tell them why you think they would make a great couple.
- Tell them that they can remain friends no matter what, even if it turns out after the date that they are not compatible as a couple.
They may be hesitant about the idea of a date at first. Reassure them that you will arrange everything. For example, you can arrange a romantic dinner for them or come up with another date idea .
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Secretly pair them up
Are you pretty sure that one of the two would not be open to a planned date? Because he or she finds it awkward or is shy? Don’t worry. The three of you can meet up and cancel at the last minute . For example, say that you got sick or that you forgot another appointment. That way, the two of them are still alone, in a clever way. The pressure or awkwardness of a first date is there a bit, but they can find out if they like each other. Don’t forget to call them the next day to ask how it went.
Let one ask the other out
In this option, you leave it up to them. Ask them their opinion about the other person and whether they like each other. If so, you can encourage them to ask the other person out. Since you can already give them information about whether the other person likes them, it will be much less scary to ask them out.
If the date ended successfully, you can compliment them when you see them again. Tell them that they look good together or that they would make a nice couple. They will appreciate a compliment like that from a mutual friend. This can give them the confidence they need as the relationship develops.
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