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You have a date with someone you met on a dating app. You are very excited to meet your match, because in the meantime you have exchanged hundreds of messages – without exaggerating. But when you meet your match, you quickly notice that things are not going as expected. The conversation remains somewhat tame and superficial, while you do not really feel a connection . You also notice that your match does not seem interested in what you have to say and is constantly looking at their phone. What now?
Afterwards, you look back on this date with a doubtful feeling. You wonder if you were too quick to judge and maybe you should give your match a second chance. You remember that your match was actually nice and that you had some things in common. You think about it for a while, because you doubt whether it was a good idea. Was the date really that bad?
What makes a date bad?
Most people go on a first date to get to know each other better. It’s a first step to see if there ’s chemistry or attraction . In that sense, a first date is a chance to explore each other’s interests, preferences, and lifestyles, and to see if there’s a potential romantic connection. And as you can imagine, that doesn’t always go well – sometimes a date is extremely bad.
A date goes bad when it doesn’t go as planned. You don’t feel the connection, there’s no attraction and there’s absolutely no future for you two. These can all be reasons why a date doesn’t go well. But there are more things that can tell you that things aren’t going well, some of which are quite subtle.
13 Things That Make a Date Bad
Is it all not so clear and you wonder if the date was really that bad? You are in doubt and not sure? You want confirmation that it really was not good? These are thirteen things that tell you that the date was bad.
1. There was little to no chemistry between you
When you go on a date, you want everything to go perfectly. You want to be inspired by the conversation, you want to fall in love and you want more. Unfortunately, that doesn’t always happen. Sometimes there’s just no chemistry between you and your date. The sparks don’t fly, there’s no chemistry and you wonder why on earth you went on this date.
2. The conversation remained superficial
Another sign that the date is not going well is if the conversation remains superficial. Your date did not seem interested in what you had to say? And the conversation was all about small talk ? Then you can safely say that the date did not go well. If there is no depth, there is often no connection on a romantic level.
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3. Your date seemed disinterested
Not showing interest is fatal for a date. Nevertheless, it often happens that one of the two people does not show interest. Why? Because they have already made their judgment. That judgment is often negative. If your date seemed uninterested, this indicates that your date is not interested in exploring the connection further.
4. Your date displayed rude or inappropriate behavior
Was your date rude or inappropriate? That is also a clear sign that the date went badly. This can range from sexist remarks to foul language. Behavior like this is unacceptable and shows that your date has no respect for you.
5. There was no emotional connection between you
If there was no emotional connection between you, such as a shared sense of humor, that is also a clear sign that the date was bad. Emotional connection is important for a good date and if that is missing, then there is no basis for a possible relationship.
6. You paid little attention to each other
Depending on what you were doing, this could be a sign that the date didn’t go well. For example, your date is more focused on texting or their surroundings than on the date. This shows that there is no connection and that the date wasn’t worth it.
7. No appointment has been made for a next date
Now this doesn’t necessarily mean the date can still be made, but it can say something about how the date went. If your date didn’t show interest in seeing you again, you can assume it’s just that one date.
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8. Your date doesn’t contact you after the date
Has it been two days and you still haven’t heard anything? If your date isn’t making an effort to contact you, it’s probably because the date wasn’t fun enough.
9. There was no physical contact
Physical contact is a signal of attraction . Wasn’t there? Didn’t you touch, hug, or kiss each other? Then this could indicate that you don’t feel attraction.
10. There was no flirting
Flirting is an important part of a successful date and if it is not there, it can mean that the date did not go well. Of course, it can also mean that neither of you are good at flirting and therefore do not do it, but as a rule, there is always some flirting when a date goes well.
11. You felt no excitement or attraction
If you didn’t feel any excitement or attraction, that’s also a clear sign that the date was bad. No physical or emotional attraction? Then there’s no future.
12. No one made an effort to make the date more fun
Dates are supposed to be fun. Nerves can make that difficult and everyone understands that. But if neither of you makes an effort to make the date more fun, that is also a clear sign that the date was bad.
13. You felt relief when the date was over
The feeling of relief says a lot about how you experienced the date. If you felt relief when the date was over, that is also a clear sign that it was a waste of your time.
There are many ways to tell if a date was bad. From poor chemistry to rude behavior, from no physical contact to no attempts to make the date more fun: these are all signs that it wasn’t worth it. But what if you’re in the middle of it, how do you end a bad date?
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5 Tips to Stop a Bad Date
Have you ever been on a bad date? No doubt you’ve thought about how on earth you could get out of the situation. At some point during the date, the thought occurred to you: “This isn’t going to work. How do I get out of here?”
It’s hard to stay where you are when all you want is to escape. How do you get out of this situation? There are several ways to end a date. These five tips can help you stop a bad date.
1. Use body language
It’s hard to see a date through to the end when you feel like there’s no connection at all. But maybe your date feels differently about it. Just walking away without saying anything isn’t an option. What should you do?
In many cases, it is polite to persist and keep it to a short date . During the date, show that you are not interested. Do not smile much, remain superficial and make sure that there is distance between you and your date. This gives sufficient signals that you are not interested. As soon as you notice that your date gets this, it is time to end the date prematurely.
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2. Indicate that there is no match
If you want to get off the date, show that you have different opinions. Choose a topic that you know is worth discussing and that you have different points of view on. This will give the conversation a negative tone, which will signal to the other person that you are not compatible .
Another option is to ask the other person about their relationship preferences, such as the type of partner they want, and then indicate why you are not that person. Keep in mind that it will not be fun for the other person. To prevent this, you can also choose to just be honest.
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3. Tell the truth
Honesty is the shortest way to the exit. Tell your date honestly that you don’t feel a connection. There’s no point in talking to someone for hours if you already know that it has no future . You can sit it out for the fun of it, but maybe you’re just creating the wrong expectations.
People appreciate honesty. By stating how you feel about the situation, you avoid ambiguity. Indicate that you enjoyed meeting each other, but that you want to keep it to this one date.
4. Suggest staying friends
If you had a good time but don’t see a future in a relationship, you can suggest staying friends. If both you and the other person agree, the date will still have a positive ending. It is important that the other person has not developed strong feelings for you. A friendship in which one person has feelings for the other, but not the other way around, is doomed to fail.
5. Suggest setting up your date
Don’t think it can lead to a relationship? Make it clear by proposing to your date to meet a friend. If your date has a nice personality, but is not right for you, you can make this proposal. The date will then know immediately that it won’t work out between you.
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