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You did it. After being slightly surprised that it was a match, you also managed to get the number of that beautiful lady. Shit just got real . Now it’s time to move the conversation to WhatsApp and drag that first date out of it.
The fact that you have received the number means that you have already got a foot in the door. But sharing a phone number is not enough: there is still a lot that can go wrong. And that is what we are going to talk about now: the mistakes that men make when they want to seduce a woman via WhatsApp.
1. Overuse of emojis
Emojis have the power to convey a range of emotions in a small image . They’re great for making your texts a little less boring, but they can also backfire. Send too many emojis and it’s game over . Emojis may be popular, but sending a wall of them all the time can make you seem immature. And that’s not what you want, because you want her to see you as an equal (or superior) – not a teenage boy.
What’s best to do? Keep your emojis to a minimum. Max out one emoji per sentence and only when you’re texting something flirty or funny.
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2. Sending sexually explicit photos and phrases
Unless she explicitly asks for it, sending a dick pic is not in your favor. Sure, you can send a pic to the lady in question every now and then to show something of yourself. But by something we don’t mean your genitals. It’s not done for most women . Don’t make this mistake, because it’s a big mistake if you think it turns her on when she didn’t even ask for it.
Depending on the conversations you’ve had with her, and whether she’s indicated she wants to sleep with you, it’s also not wise to text sexual phrases . Provocative is okay, ambiguous comments are also possible, but be careful with sexting .
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3. Do not (video)call
We live in the 21st century . So we have many more options than just text messages, such as audio and video. Many men do not use them, even though they offer an opportunity to build a connection faster. If the conversation is going well, call her (unannounced) in the middle of the conversation – this can be done via an audio or video call.
Because women can be quite guarded, you are expected to break down their walls. Texting alone makes this particularly difficult, as they don’t hear your voice, see your body movements, or get a glimpse of your personality. Plus, she’ll get a thrill when your name pops up on her screen when she gets an incoming call.
Most women will appreciate this digital form of courage. They will admire that you are willing to start an audio or video call, because that requires some confidence. And we all know how attractive confidence is.
4. Not cutting the knot
Should I ask her out now or should I wait a bit longer? Some men always wait: they never make the move to ask her out. They think: if I don’t ask, I can’t get rejected. Very clever, but also not. What they don’t realize is that they could have gotten a ‘yes’ long ago, if they had just asked.
A lot of men make the mistake of texting all the time. They text and text and text some more – as if the fish needs to be reeled in slowly to prevent it from escaping. But that’s not how it works. Women are not fish.
Remember this: when she gives you her number, she is interested in getting to know you better. She wants to explore your attraction, and if you ask her specifically and clearly to do something, she will probably say, believe it or not, “YES.”
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5. Waiting too long to respond
“Don’t respond too quickly, or you’ll look desperate.” We’ve all heard the advice. But these days, everyone is so glued to their smartphones that it doesn’t really matter anymore. You can respond whenever you want – whether that’s right away or 5 minutes later. What’s not a good idea? Wait three days, because that’s the worst advice ever. Text her whenever it’s convenient for you and don’t bother with the ‘waiting game’. It’s not worth it.
Don’t be this man
- 2:21 PM: Hey, how are you?
- 2:23 PM: Busy at work?
- 2:35 PM: Curious about your day!
- 3:15 PM: Hello?
- 3:18 PM: Still working?
- 5:01 PM: HEEEEEEEEEEY?
- 6:15 PM: Free yet?
6. Sending too many messages
Most men know by now that it takes more than a “how are you?” to get a conversation going. But there’s a tipping point in the conversation—the point where it becomes too much . You’re not writing a book. The moment a woman realizes that you’re sending way more (and longer) messages than she is, things are bad. Because that’s when she realizes you’re not that interesting—or creepy .
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7. Friendzonegedrag
If you don’t excite her, you’ll end up in the friend zone – the situation where she thinks you’re cute but doesn’t feel attracted to you. To avoid that, you do exactly the things a best friend wouldn’t do. You flirt with her, tease her, make teasing remarks and say provocative sentences to her. While a best friend would switch to small talk while texting, you keep it playful and provocative.
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8. Keep texting
For most men, texting a woman is a necessity. It is necessary to achieve a goal, that is how we men think about it. But because most women do not just meet up with men and want a decent conversation first, some men think that texting is a goal in itself. It is not. The more you keep texting, the greater the chance that she will lose interest.
Experience has taught us that some women never want to meet up. Yes, they are on Tinder . And yes, they want to move the conversation to WhatsApp. And they also want to text you daily. But meet up? No way.
Whether it is nerves that prevent them from meeting, a distrust of men, or something else: a meeting is not in the cards. That is why it is unwise to keep texting, because we repeat: texting is not the goal.
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