Share This Article
First dates are unique experiences. From sweaty palms and awkward silences to the search for conversation topics. They are unique situations that can be both exciting and unbearable. And then there is the added conundrum: how do you end a first date? In other words: what do you do when the date is over?
Do you propose a second date ? Do you simply say “bye” with a quick wave, without mentioning a sequel? Or do you make a decision on the spot about whether or not to kiss your date? While many people focus their full attention on what to say during the date, it’s just as important to think about how to end the date.
ALSO READ: 114 Best Date Ideas for First, Second and More Dates
8 Ways to End a First Date
Whether you’re meeting for coffee or dinner at a fancy restaurant , it’s important to understand how to end a first date the right way. Whether it was the best or worst first date you’ve ever been on, here are eight ways to end a first date.
1. Say ‘thank you’
If you want to do the right and polite thing, you should always say “thank you.” Even if things didn’t go as planned or the date was a disappointment. And even if you paid for all the drinks and the other person showed up with a negative attitude. Expressing gratitude is one of the easiest ways to end the date on a positive note. You could thank the other person for their time, for traveling to the date location, or simply for being there.
2. Ask yourself these questions
To properly end the date, some preparation is needed. That is to say: before and during the date, ask yourself questions about the end of the date. This prevents awkward situations when the moment arises. Ask yourself these questions:
- Who’s going to pay the bill?
- Should I pay or discuss it first?
- How much should I resist if the other person insists on paying?
- Should there be a kiss?
- What do I do if I don’t want to kiss?
- Do I want a second date with this person?
- What will I say if I want to see the other person again?
- How do I make it clear that I don’t want a second date ?
- Do I say this on the spot or afterwards via app?
3. Shake hands, hug or kiss
If you don’t want to kiss at the end of the date, it’s good to know that it’s not mandatory. It doesn’t have to be, even if it was the best date ever. To avoid awkward moments at the end of the date, here’s what to consider at the end of the date:
- Extend your hand when you end the date
- Turn your head away, open your arms and give a hug (and quickly move away again)
- Lock your arms and keep your distance if you don’t want physical contact
- Say you don’t want to kiss if it’s not clear
If you don’t feel like kissing after the date , you can express this both non-verbally and verbally. Non-verbally is the usual way, where you use your body language to make it clear. A closed posture and keeping your distance are two important aspects to make your unwillingness known. With the verbal way, you tell the other person, so that there can be no doubt.
ALSO READ: Couples Have More in Common Than We Think’
4. Sit out the date
If the date is disappointing, you may want to leave early. But that is not polite. Sitting out the date is the only polite way. Saying goodbye right away is annoying. Not only for yourself, but especially for the other person. How would you feel if you arrived on a date and were immediately rejected ? Most people would experience it as a slap in the face. That is why it is wise to keep a first date short, so that you do not have to nod and smile out of politeness for longer than necessary.
5. Suggest a second date
If you want to see your date again, make an appointment right away to repeat the encounter. Or at least indicate that you are open to doing it again. Although you may be tempted to say something like “I’ll talk to you later!”, you will accomplish more by setting up a second date right away, including all the details. This method also helps you decipher how the other person feels about you.
If the other person would like to see you again, you are more likely to leave the first date with concrete plans for a second. If the other person is less interested, the second date remains an open option. And if the second date is refused, you know right away that you don’t have to invest any more time in it.
ALSO READ: One-Sided Relationship? 22 Signs It’s Coming from One Side
6. Be kind
Even though you were counting down the minutes, it is always in your best interest to end the date on a nice and respectful note. You may be tempted to say that the other person is boring in real life, but that is not something you should say. Remain friendly, civil, and well-mannered. Everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt on a first date, because few people are completely themselves in this situation.
7. Don’t give false hope
It is also important that you do not string the other person along by saying that you are open to meeting up more often when you are not. In other words, do not give false hope. It is not polite to make plans if you know at that moment that you are going to cancel them. If you do not feel strong enough to reject the other person on the spot, just say that you will let them know.
ALSO READ: Is He The One? Not If He Does These 25 Things
8. Think about your safety
We all know that some people react badly to rejection. That’s why you may be tempted not to reject someone even though you’d like to. In these situations, it’s wise to reject them after the fact, rather than right then and there. It’s a simple tactic to stay safe, especially if the idea of rejection makes you feel unsafe. When in doubt, always put safety before politeness.
P.S. Are you already following Gistinger.com on Facebook , Instagram and Twitter?