Cancel a Date? This is How You Cancel a Date

After a long work week, you flop down on the couch. Finally weekend, you think. At the same time as that thought shoots through your head, you get a message from your match. Or will continue tonight, because your match hasn’t heard from you all day. You feel really bad, because you don’t feel like attending the date at all. You would rather cancel the date, but at the same time you don’t know how to go about that.

You spread out the pile of clothes you had already picked out for tonight, but you actually feel uncomfortable at the thought of going there. So, as you put the pile of clothes back, you hesitate about what to do. You absolutely do not feel like going on the date . What now?

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How do you cancel a date?

Cancelling a date can be stressful and scary. The person you were going to date has been preparing for it and may have been looking forward to it all week. And then you come with the disappointing news that it can’t go ahead. As hard as it is, it’s part of (dating) life sometimes. We’ll tell you how to politely and respectfully cancel a date, what to say and how to handle it.

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1. Be honest about the reason

Are you honestly saying that you prefer a night of Netflix over a fun date ? Are you saying that you lost interest during the week? Or are you making something up that has nothing to do with reality? When it comes to actually saying the cancellation, be honest about the reason and apologize. Be very clear, but also polite and respectful in what you say.

It is also important not to think only of yourself. Apologize for the burden your cancellation is causing the other person. This may make it easier for them to understand your situation. Let your match know that you still want to meet, just not tonight. Above all, confirm that canceling this one date is not a reflection of how you feel about them.

• “I’m so sorry, but I have to cancel our date.”
• “I’m afraid I have bad news, I have to cancel our appointment.”
• “Hey, something unexpected came up and I need to reschedule our appointment.”
• “I am so disappointed. Our date can’t go ahead.”
• “I hope you understand, but I have to postpone our date.”
• “I’m sorry, but I can’t make it to our date tonight.”
• “Something came up and I have to reschedule our appointment.”

2. Move the date to another time

Do you still want to date this person, just not now? Then offer an alternative for a future date. This immediately shows that you are genuinely interested, but that it is just not convenient now. Say that you are very sorry that the date cannot go ahead and suggest another time.

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3. Tell it well in advance

Do you wake up on the wrong side of the bed in the morning and don’t expect things to get better during the day? Let them know as early as possible that you want to cancel the date. It is never a good idea to cancel a date five minutes in advance. If you do, do it well in advance.

Timing is everything. Try to let them know as soon as possible, so they don’t have to prepare. Use clear sentences to indicate that your date can’t go ahead and that you want to cancel the appointment.

4. Say in advance that you are busy

If you know when planning the date that you might be too tired or busy, say so right away. This lowers the other person’s expectations. Say that you are busy and are not entirely sure whether you can go ahead with the date. Deadlines, overtime and other obligations: if you indicate this in advance, a cancellation will not be completely unexpected.

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5. Be honest if you don’t feel it

It can happen that from the moment the date is in the agenda, you lose interest more and more . Instead of the anticipation of seeing each other growing, the interest in meeting decreases. Sometimes things don’t go as expected and then it is possible that you don’t ‘feel’ it anymore. If you experience this, be honest.

• “I want to let you know that I have started to doubt whether this is going to work out. That is why I think we should cancel our date.”
• “I have come to the conclusion over the past few days that we are not the right couple and I am therefore cancelling our date.”
• “I’m afraid I’d like to leave it at that. Our date can’t go ahead, unfortunately.”
• “I think we’re better off canceling our appointment.”
• “I hope you understand, but I think we shouldn’t go ahead with our date.”

Canceling a date is no fun for anyone. Especially not when the other person has been looking forward to it for days. It could be that you are unexpectedly ill or have something urgent to do, which can make it difficult to show up for the appointment. However, if you are open and honest, then it is not a problem to cancel a date. Canceling a date is never fun, but sometimes there is simply no other option.

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