Share This Article
You are nervously waiting at the agreed place. You have done your best to look nice and your heart is beating faster with excitement. But the minutes tick by and your date still hasn’t shown up. You feel a knot in your stomach and after a while you start to doubt whether you have said or done something wrong. Or even worse: did your date forget?
While you anxiously look at your phone, you hope for a message or an apology for the delay. But no message comes and you feel more and more disappointed. In fact, you feel abandoned. Should you wait longer? Should you call? Or should you just leave and forget this painful situation as soon as possible? We will tell you more about it.
ALSO READ: 114 Best Date Ideas for First, Second and More Dates
What to do if your date doesn’t show up?
It can happen that you are excited about a promising date, only to have your date not show up. It is disappointing and nobody wants to experience it, but it can happen. We simply have no control over the actions of others. But that does not mean that you should let yourself be dragged into a negative spiral. Let’s take a look at what you can do if your date doesn’t show up.
1. Don’t panic
Your heart is pounding, your date is nowhere to be seen at the agreed time and your thoughts are racing. But wait a minute: there is no reason to panic right away. Try to stay calm. There may be a simple explanation for the absence, such as the wrong time, a small misunderstanding or a traffic jam on the way. Breathe in and out calmly and take a moment to think before you take action.
2. Send a quick message and wait a bit longer
If you haven’t heard from your date 5 or 10 days after the agreed time, feel free to send a quick message to check if everything is okay. Sometimes it can be that your date is delayed or that something unexpected has happened. Therefore, give your date some time to respond before jumping to conclusions. Maybe there will still be a good explanation and who knows, your date might already be walking close to the place where you agreed to meet.
3. Don’t feel ashamed
It’s normal to feel a little embarrassed when someone doesn’t show up for a date. But remember that these things happen and it’s not your fault. So don’t get bogged down in self-doubt or negative thoughts about yourself. If a date doesn’t show up, it says more about them than it does about you.
ALSO READ: Couples Have More in Common Than We Think’
4. Fake a phone call
If you feel awkward and don’t want others to see that your date didn’t show up, you can always pretend you don’t have a date. Call a friend, a family member: it will seem like you’re not looking forward to a date at all. Sometimes sharing your feelings and thoughts can also give you a sense of relief. A friend can also cheer you up and remind you that this person isn’t worth your time anyway.
5. Leave if you don’t hear anything
If your date doesn’t show up on time and you don’t hear anything, don’t wait around forever. Give your date a reasonable amount of time to respond or let them know there’s a delay. But if you don’t hear anything, leave. Keep your head up, leave the place, and go home. It may not be the date you were hoping for, but your time is valuable and you deserve respect.
6. Control your anger
Anger doesn’t solve anything. While it’s understandable that you might get angry when someone lets you down, there’s no point in immediately throwing a tantrum. Try to stay calm and think soberly about what you can do now.
7. Maintain your self-esteem
You don’t let something so small get you down, do you? Don’t let this temporary disappointment get you down. Be nonchalant about it and show that your happiness doesn’t depend on the actions of others.
ALSO READ: Is He The One? Not If He Does These 25 Things
8. Be prepared
Prevention is better than cure, right? Be prepared for a situation where your date doesn’t show up. Imagine a few possible scenarios in advance and think about how you would handle it. That way, you’ll be mentally prepared for any disappointments and it will be less daunting when it actually happens.
9. Treat yourself
Don’t let an unexpected absence ruin your mood. Instead, stop by the grocery store and treat yourself to something nice. Maybe a nice dinner, a dessert or some other treats.
10. Know that it says something about them, not you
Remember that your date’s behavior says nothing about you or anything about your date. If your date doesn’t even bother to explain or apologize for their absence, it says more about their lack of respect than it does about your worth as a person.
11. Don’t make it bigger than it is
While it’s annoying when someone doesn’t show up, it’s not the end of the world. It’s just one moment on a random day, one of thousands of days you’re alive. Don’t make the situation bigger than it is. It’s just one date, and there are many more opportunities and people that will come your way.
12. Think about how you respond to apologies
If your date does eventually contact you and apologize, take some time to think about how you will respond. It is understandable that you are angry or disappointed and that you will make this clear. However, depending on the reason, it may be wise to also look at the situation from the other person’s perspective. Perhaps your date was powerless and could not have done anything about it.
13. Don’t send text messages
We all get it. You feel frustrated and ignored when your date doesn’t show up. However, don’t be tempted to send messages that you might regret later. This won’t improve the situation. Show that you ’re not desperate and stick to the one message asking if everything is okay.
ALSO READ: One-Sided Relationship? 22 Signs It’s Coming from One Side
14. Do not contact again
If your date doesn’t give a decent explanation for the absence and doesn’t bother to apologize, cut off all contact. Don’t text or respond to messages yourself. This is the only way to show yourself respect. You wouldn’t let them treat you like that, would you?
15. Don’t schedule a new date
If your date doesn’t show up and doesn’t have a good reason or offer an apology, don’t schedule another date. If your date doesn’t respect you, why give them a second chance?
16. See the benefits of the situation
How did you react to the situation? Did you hold your ground and be stronger than you thought? While not showing up is annoying, it can also be an opportunity to get to know yourself better. You might even discover that you actually enjoy your own company . In other words, try to see the positive side of the situation.
17. Think about the possible reasons
It can be hard to understand why someone doesn’t show up, but it’s worth thinking about their possible reasons. Did you put too much pressure on your date? Did your date have doubts? Were you both unsure of yourselves? This doesn’t mean the behavior isn’t unacceptable, but it can help you understand the situation.
ALSO READ: 35 Playful Dates to Keep Your Relationship Alive
18. Don’t think that all men/women are the same
One person’s behavior is not representative of all men or women. Most men and women are on time. If they are late, they will let you know. Only a few – the bad apples – remain silent. Don’t let this disappointing experience affect your future dating life.
19. Try to laugh about it
Sometimes the best way to deal with adversity is to laugh about it. It may seem sad at the time, but you’ll laugh about it later. Life is full of unexpected twists and turns, and the ability to laugh about these things only makes you stronger.
20. Take a break
If you feel overwhelmed by the situation, and absolutely cannot understand how people can do that, take a break from dating. Give yourself some time to recover and build your confidence before you start swiping for love again.
21. Date again
Don’t let this one bad date discourage you from dating again. Everyone experiences disappointments. Some meet a date who looks nothing like the pictures, others end up with someone who is actually ten years older. Disappointments are part of the dating game, but that doesn’t mean it will always be that way.
P.S. Are you already following Gistinger.com on Facebook , Instagram and Twitter?