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It’s a busy day at the office. You and your team are busy with the final preparations for a big presentation that will take place soon. Suddenly, there’s a knock on the door and someone steps in. Everyone looks up in surprise, because no one expected anyone else to join them. The newcomer introduces himself as your new colleague and you like that.
From the moment your new colleague walks in, there is a special connection between you. It feels like you have known each other for years, but in reality you only met three minutes ago. Something is going on right away and an intimate bond quickly develops between the two of you. In the days that follow, you talk more and more, discover common interests and become more drawn to each other. It is also at that moment that everyone in the team notices. Something beautiful is developing between you: love.
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In love with your colleague?
Love is not held back by the terms of employment of a company. That is why relationships that are formed in the workplace are quite common. Without even looking for it, you can fall in love with your colleague because you work and talk with them every day.
In addition, you probably meet a lot of new people through your work and there are often situations where you are comfortable with each other, such as during work itself or during your lunch break. All this can create a bond that can lead to feelings of love and attraction, in addition to a friendly bond.
Are you worried about whether it is allowed? According to Dutch law, it is allowed to date a colleague and start a relationship. Or in other words: it is not forbidden . Depending on the employment conditions at a company, it may however be forbidden, because the relationship also exists when you are working together. It is therefore wise to consult with your employer in advance whether it is allowed to date a colleague.
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6 Rules for Dating a Coworker
Although relationships with colleagues are subject to certain rules in some companies, it is often allowed to have a love relationship. What are the rules for dating a colleague? These differ per company. Either they are already included in a code of conduct drawn up by the company or you agree on the rules together with your employer. These can be those rules.
1. Consult with your employer
Before you start a relationship with a colleague, it is wise to consult with your manager first. This gives your manager the opportunity to identify any problems and discuss how the relationship can affect the work environment. Together you can also make agreements about what the relationship will look like on the work floor.
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2. Adhere to the code of conduct
If your company has a code of conduct, stick to it. Your collective labor agreement, contract, or house rules may contain rules on how to deal with a relationship with a colleague at work. For example, there may be a reporting requirement, or you may not walk hand in hand or work together on the same project. If you do not adhere to these rules, there may be consequences, especially if one of you has a managerial role.
3. Behave professionally
Employers want to know that you are in a relationship with a coworker , but they would rather not see it at all in the workplace. That is why it is important to remain professional in your behavior in the workplace, regardless of the state of your relationship.
Are things not going well between you? Leave your emotions at home and behave emotionlessly towards your colleague – who is also your partner. For an employer, it is important that you continue to do your work and that the relationship does not affect your productivity or the atmosphere on the work floor.
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4. Avoid conflicts
A relationship at work can lead to conflicts with other colleagues. As for the cause, it mainly concerns things like the division of tasks or promotions. If you do not treat your partner in the same way as all other colleagues, then keep in mind that conflicts can arise. If you favor your partner, you will soon get crooked faces.
You can prevent such conflicts by being open and honest with your colleagues. Treat your partner the same as your other colleagues. In any case, do not give your partner preferential treatment.
5. Respect the boundaries of others
Other coworkers may enjoy seeing how much you are in love, but they don’t want to get involved in the relationship. This means not sharing intimate details with coworkers or expecting your coworkers to want to talk about your relationship problems. Your coworkers also don’t need to see you flirting , kissing, or hugging each other.
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6. Consider the consequences
Dating a coworker can potentially have consequences for your career. This can happen, for example, if your manager decides to move one of you to another department. Or if another coworker becomes jealous of you because you managed to win over that handsome coworker.
Dating a coworker can be an exciting experience, but it can also have consequences for your work environment and career. The relationship can affect your professional relationship and the dynamics at work. If your relationship does not work out, it can lead to an awkward situation in the company where you work. Even if your relationship does work out, tensions can arise if coworkers think you are taking advantage of your ‘coworker’ because of the relationship.
All in all, we can say that dating a colleague is only possible if you follow the rules. Sometimes those rules are unwritten and verbally agreed upon, other times they are in the company’s terms of employment. And those rules are there for a reason.
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