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The idea that people in long-term relationships become more similar has been around for many years. In 1987, scientists at the University of Michigan began studying the phenomenon. Do married couples become more similar over time? They photographed the couples when they got married and then photographed the couples again 25 years later. The answer turned out to be yes , because when the scientists compared the photos, they found that the couples had become more similar.
The theory behind the study, which scientists still cite today, was that emotional processes can cause changes in the face. By using facial muscles in the same way for a long time, facial features – such as wrinkles and expressions – are permanently changed.
If two people live together for a long period of time, their faces would change in a similar way, thanks to the shared emotions. Or in other words, their faces would start to look more alike. To this day, people are convinced that this is ‘scientifically proven’. But… it isn’t.
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Couples will no longer look alike
Couples stop looking alike over time, according to a new 2020 analysis from Stanford University scientists. Here’s what the scientists had to say about the 1987 study:
“Although elegantly designed, it was based on an extremely small sample of 12 married heterosexual couples, and the findings have never been replicated.”
To investigate again, Stanford University scientists repeated the 1987 experiment, but with a much larger sample of potential “lookalikes” and combined it with the research capabilities of 21st century technology. They not only had humans make the comparisons (153 people), but also a facial recognition algorithm that had previously been shown to outperform humans at judging facial resemblance.
While the 1987 study only examined photographs of 12 couples from the time they were first married and 25 years later, the new research collected images of 517 married couples. Their faces from shortly after they were married were compared to photos taken 20 to 69 years later.
“The faces of spouses look similar, but they do not become closer over time.”
The researchers expected to find more similarities between the couples, but that was not the case. They found nothing to suggest that couples become more similar as the years go by. And they admitted that even they were surprised by the results.
While the research team didn’t find any evidence that couples become more similar, the results did confirm that people’s partners are surprisingly similar. “Consistent with previous research, we found evidence of homogamy, or the tendency for spouses to have similar faces,” the researchers said. In other words, couples don’t become more similar as their relationship progresses; they start to look more alike from the start.
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Why couples often look alike
When we’re on a dating app , it doesn’t take a lot of analysis to confirm that most singles are looking for someone who’s about the same height as us. It’s no different for the age group – a few years difference is the standard. But those aren’t the only similarities people look for in a partner, there are many more. But since we can’t marry ourselves and have kids, we often look for someone who’s a lot like us.
Despite the idea that opposites attract , research shows that people are naturally drawn to people who are similar to them. It’s familiar and familiar. Scientists call this the similarity effect , the tendency to be attracted to people who are similar to yourself in important ways. One of those similarities is your physical appearance. Because you’re familiar with your physical appearance, you tend to like people with similar traits more than people who don’t.
A 2013 study demonstrates this with an experiment. In the study, people were shown photos with the face of their romantic partner. However, some of the photos were (digitally) altered to include the features of another face. These were mixed with 22% of the face of a stranger or 22% of their own face.
The result of the study was that all participants consistently rated the image with their own face in it as the most attractive. Not only did the participants find this face more attractive than the one of their partner with the features of a stranger in it, but also more attractive than the actual photo of their partner.
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6 Reasons Why Couples Look Alike
The phenomenon of couples who look alike has also not escaped anyone on social media. Lookalike couples have been the subject of public fascination for years with Facebook pages for ANWB couples and Siblings or Dating games played on Instagram. Everyone likes to share their opinions about these romantic doppelgangers. But why do these couples look so much alike? And why do people like to date others who look a lot like themselves? The similarity effect is perhaps the biggest reason, but there are many more reasons.
1. Breed preference
According to Karen Wu, assistant professor of psychology at California State University, one of the most obvious reasons why couples look alike is because of group bias. People who date tend to prefer the same race . This is true for both straight and non-straight couples. Having a partner of the same race increases the likelihood that they will have similar characteristics.
2. The familiarity effect
We tend to seek out partners who are similar to ourselves because of the familiarity effect, also known as the mere-exposure effect. “When we are exposed to a stimulus over and over again, we tend to like it more because of the ease of processing,” Wu says in PsychologyToday . “To our brains, that means easy equals pleasant.”
In one of the studies on the familiarity effect, participants were asked to rate the attractiveness of faces. The researchers found that the more faces were different from the participant’s, the less attractive they were rated. The more familiar faces were actually more attractive to the participants. And the more faces the participants were shown, the higher the attractiveness of both the different and familiar faces were rated.
3. Competition
If we all went for the most attractive potential partner, without settling for less, the world population would shrink by the day. But it doesn’t. And (almost) everyone manages to find a partner sooner or later. As singles, we may be in competition with other singles, but the choices we make keep it balanced. In practice, it comes down to the fact that people are more likely to find someone attractive who is equally attractive . And this can cause similarities between these people.
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4. Sexual imprinting
In addition to preferring their own face, people may unconsciously seek out their parent’s face in that of a partner. Researchers suggest that young children may learn what a potential partner should look like through a process called “sexual imprinting.” That is, parents may model for their children what their future partner should look like. And if a parent is the model, then a potential partner will resemble the parent and probably themselves as well.
5. Similar social judgments
Researchers believe that two partners may choose each other based on what others think of them. Because of the judgment of others, they have similar personalities, so the idea goes. The researchers believe this because in one study they found that the perceived personality of faces—the personality that others expect—predicted both facial resemblance and the likelihood that a couple would actually be together.
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6. Preference for the same body type
While many studies have focused on facial similarities between couples, body type is another major factor in how much couples look alike. In fact, studies have shown that couples are similar in their body mass index , weight , and height. This preference for the same body type can be due to preferences for like-minded people or shared lifestyles (in the case of weight).
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