I Hope You Never Really Understand

I hope you never really understand what it’s like to be burned out. That you will never know what it feels like to no longer have a reason to get out of bed in the morning. What it feels like to be so lonely, sad and tired. So tired that you can no longer even do the simplest chores. Even so tired that you can’t even manage to take care of yourself.

I hope you never understand how lonely it is to be burned out . That there are very few people who understand you. That it hurts so much when people tell you to just do fun things, that everything will turn out fine. That people tell you to call if there is anything they can do for you, but you don’t even know where to start or what to ask. That you get lonely because you don’t want to bother people. And that it is so nice when people unexpectedly come to you and help you. Help you by doing the dishes or vacuuming.

ALSO READ: 4 Reasons To Indicate Your Limits

I hope you never understand what it feels like to be so ashamed . So feeling like you’ve failed. I hope you never have to learn to accept burnout. To accept that you are sick and are at home for the time being and that things will not be the way they once were for a while.

I hope you never have to feel what panic feels like . What panic feels like when you have to walk outside. What it feels like to be so nervous that you can’t sleep. That you are so tired, but you don’t sleep a wink.

I hope you never have to be so sad . So sad that sometimes you think life doesn’t have to be like this anymore. So sad that you no longer know what to do with yourself.

I hope you don’t have to put on that mask . That you pretend to be happy while you’re crying inside. That you go on your birthday and sit in the toilet crying and then put your mask back on because you too are trying to get back to normal life.

ALSO READ: My Journey to Recovery: How I Ultimately Overcame Burnout

I hope that if someone is burned out, depressed, sad, sick or whatever, you never judge them again. No matter what the reason, I hope you respect someone, no matter how difficult it is to understand. I hope you will be patient and I hope you will help him or her without judgment. I hope you accept that you cannot always understand someone and that no one expects you to either.

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