6 Things to Talk About with a Woman

For many men, approaching women is a bridge too far. They want to, but they don’t dare. Men feel anxious because they fear the awkward silence, even more than a potential rejection. Getting rejected may not be so scary for them, but not knowing what to say? That is a scary thought.

We’ve all been in the situation where you’re having a conversation with someone, the topic has run its course, and you’re staring at each other without saying anything. While you’re trying to think of a topic, it feels more like a staring contest. Awkward . If you’ve ever been in this situation, you know that awkward is an understatement .

6 things to talk about

Hopefully these things to talk about will help you avoid that situation in the future. Bury them deep in your mind so you always have something to talk about. And when you do have a conversation with a woman, see if you can accomplish this:

• Tell and ask her things that are new to her.
• Keep her interested.
• Challenge her emotionally or intellectually.
• Keep the conversation natural.

More importantly, and not to be forgotten, it’s not so much what you say, but how you say it. Whatever topic you choose, keep it playful , interesting, and lighthearted: the essential ingredients of an enjoyable conversation. Here are 6 things to talk about with a woman.

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1. Culture: books, films and music

The first topic is easy in many ways , because everyone has an opinion about it. We are talking about culture, or everything that man creates, such as music, movies, and books . As a starting topic, these are easy things to talk about with a woman, because she is not going to share her biggest dreams and deepest fears with you right away. To get to that level, you are long past the “I don’t know a topic” stage.

That’s why you need a few conversation topics that are low-effort but will keep the conversation going and interesting. Get her talking about her favorite Netflix series, what kind of music she gets off to, and what romantic movies she’s seen dozens of times but can’t get enough of.

It all sounds so simple, but a few simple ‘what’s your favorite’ questions aren’t enough . If you don’t ask further, or if she doesn’t reveal much herself, then there’s little left of a potentially interesting conversation.

The trick is to ask follow-up questions that dig beneath the surface. Does she mention that she loves music? Don’t just ask what her favorite artist is. Make it specific and personal: ask her to play you two of her favorite songs that you listen to right there and then.

2. Passion: hobby, ambition and dreams

All people have one thing in common: when you ask them about their passion, they start talking about it enthusiastically and never stop. We all like to talk about our passions, while someone else listens with interest and fascination. We all want such a conversation partner, especially women.

Who doesn’t like to daydream about a happy future? Suppose you won the lottery: what would you do with 5 million euros net? Ask her about her biggest dreams, what she wants to achieve in life and most importantly: how she wants to be happy. Happy feelings . When she is comfortable with you, only a few personal questions are needed to let her tell you about her passions, ambitions and dreams.

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4. Travel: holidays and countries

When you ask people about their fondest memories, they often talk about the trips they’ve taken. Whether it’s a trip to the Jatiluwih rice fields in Bali or the neon-lit Las Vegas Strip , the images of such trips are often etched in the minds of travelers. People love to travel, and even those who don’t have the budget for it daydream about what it would be like.

But if you take this route in the conversation, don’t make the mistake of just asking where she’s been. Ask more. What place stole her heart? What made it so special? How did she feel there? These kinds of conversations tell you much more than just a list of nice countries.

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4. Experiences: the past and the baggage

Talking about the things you’ve done is an easy way to get to know each other . Funny anecdotes about what you’ve experienced give insight into your character and humor. Stories about the failures in your life show your vulnerable and sensitive side. In addition, your childhood is a big part of who you are today. Talking about your childhood, school, and the associated life lessons shows that you are willing to share the intimate parts of yourself.

5. Interesting things you experience

Without a doubt, this topic is one of the easiest things to talk about with a woman: the things that happen to you. Tell her what happened during your day. The more interesting your life, the more there is to talk about. Conversely, ask how her day was. But don’t limit it literally to “How was your day?” Go deeper .

If you ask her how her day was in the same way over and over again, you’ll get the same answer over and over again. “Fine!” It shows you’re polite and considerate, but nothing more. According to Albert Einstein, it’s the definition of insanity: “Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” Here are a few examples of how to say the same thing in a different way:

• What word would you use to describe today?
• What surprised you today?
• How was today different from yesterday?
• What could you have done better today?
• Who did you spend the most time with today?

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6. Yourself: what makes you unique

If you think women can only talk about clothes, shoes and make-up, you are seriously shortchanging them. Just because you are a man and she is a woman, doesn’t mean you don’t have overlapping interests. Who knows, maybe she was a gabber once and still gets the rush when she hears the terrorcore beats on TV. Or maybe that tough rock chick studies the chess opening of the day in the evening.

Assume that every woman has something special. Ask her questions about who she really is and try to get her to tell you what makes her unique. Once she starts talking, you won’t be able to stop her. And in the meantime, you’ll have plenty of time to tell her about yourself, if she sees that your interest goes beyond her looks . Try to test her waters in the beginning, see what she likes. You might find something that makes her more unique than you might think.

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Enough inspiration?

All of the above things to talk about are not meant to be studied. Never go into a conversation with a checklist of topics you want to bring up in the conversation. It is not an interview or a job application and you are not a talk show host. When you go into a conversation with a ready-made list of topics, it does not come across as natural. It is fake .

You can prepare yourself by reading up on all sorts of easy topics, but ultimately these are just for inspiration. If you allow the topics to come up naturally, the conversation will flow much more naturally. The best strategy is to get inspiration on all sorts of topics beforehand so that they can come up naturally later in the conversation. And if you ever don’t know what to say, you can fall back on what you just read.

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